NEW Poptards YouTube Channel! Poptards Interview!

JD and Uncle Dunklenutz head to World Cafe Live for a screening of "The Wizard" and enjoy some little Nintendo competition. While there JD interviews Mark Wolf of Plug and Play Events. Enjoy this interview and there will be more videos of this event to come.

Comics: Blackest Night #8 by Optimus Douche

Read the original and all of Optimus Douche's other reviews at www.aintitcool.com

With a blinding white light the Blackest Night is finally extinguished. Did this moment cause me to ejaculate with glee? No. Am I going to derail Johns’ writing like so many other reviews bombarding the Intertubes? No. Because at the end of the day, the BLACKEST NIGHT finale was exactly what I expected — and it is no fault of Johns. If there’s anyone to blame, it’s the current state of comics. Comics have always been a business, but today they serve less as the primary business and more of a whirling dervish spitting out synergistic channels of upsell revenue in the form of movies, video games, cartoons and apps…the game can’t change too much without those other channels (that keep the stocks afloat, which keeps our books coming, etc…) suffering a complete collapse.

POP5 April: COMIC MOVIE SCENES

Hey there! We'll be posting a new monthly segment called POP5, wherein we will post our top 5 list for any given topic. If you have an idea for next month's list, let us know. Email your brilliant ideas to info@poptardsgo.com

So without further ado: this month's Pop5 List of Comic Book Movie Scenes!!

Feh! You got some mishegas in my mashugana!

In my quest to see all 10 movies of the Oscars Best Picture Nominations I have arrived at number 9, A Serious Man. Let me just say this first, you have to see it to understand it fully. I didn't ever see any publicity or trailers for this before I watched it.

Hard times have fallen upon Professor Lawrence Gopnik, Michael Stuhlbarg. Problems with his mishpocheh, family for you non Yiddish speaking goys, problems with health, problems with some record company he has no knowledge about, problems with his career and no one will give him a straight answer about how to solve his problems. OY VEH!!!! (That's right I am yelling at you with text...also imagine me with my arms in the air)

This film has very few people I could match with other films, but this film was not without some standout new talent. Pretty much the only person I recognized was the troubled, but gifted, Uncle Arthur, Richard Kind. I kind of recognized the awkward and intimidating neighbor Mr. Brandt, Peter Breittmayer, from several different tv shows.

Some of the new talent that I enjoyed where Sari Lennick, the overly pushy mother, Fred Melamed, the mother's new husband, Aaron Wolff, the trouble-making son. With all these actors and actresses contributing you get a socially awkward comedy/drama movie about a Jewish community in the Midwest of the United States in what seems to be in the 50's.

See this movie and let me know what you think. I enjoyed it and think it was definitely deserving of top 10, but other then that honorable mention is all it should've gotten. I will stick with Hurt Locker.

Movie Review by Pete Tutton: HACKERS

In part 2 of our basic cable repertory theater showcase, we present mid 90’s cult fave, hackers. this time-capsule of a techno thriller stars whatever-happened-to-johnny-lee-miller as dade, aka zero cool, aka crash override, a hacker since infancy who rose to infamy after crashing 1,507 systems in one day, dropping the NYSE 7 points, a stat that all of his hacker buddies can quote readily. this of course earns him buku cybercred and at least 1,507 exp points. as a consequence of this criminal act, dade is forbidden from operating computers and touch tone phones until his 18th birthday. rotary phones are still ok though.

so, following the obligatory family breakup, dade and his mom move to ny into a little apartment where dade continues to sit in his room and fuck shit up on the interwebs with his dial up modem and dot matrix printer. next comes the obligatory new guy in school sequence where dade meets the characters who would soon make up his cybercrew. angelina jolie is kate, aka acid burn, a femme fatale who sports a pixie haircut and quizzical eyebrows, a combo that leaves her looking like a disturbingly foxy spock. dade first encounters kate inside the ol’ series-of-tubes in a heated hacker battle over a public access video cassette. yes, a public access video cassette. acid burn got all pissed that crash override was in her cyberturf. why her turf includes the video library of a public access station is really anybody’s guess.

these two develop quite a nice adversarial relationship that is allowed to play out through the whole film and doesn’t pay off until the last quarter of the movie. which is a good thing. dade starts off as a victim of kate’s pool on the roof prank where he and all the other first-day nerds gullible enough to go look at it (wow, I’ve never seen a POOL before! wonder what that looks like!) get locked on the pool-less roof, and he finishes the movie making sweet sweet love to kate in a pool. on the roof. of some other building, not the school.

the conflict of the movie kicks in when a member of dade’s crew downloads (slowly, this is 1995 after all) a garbage file from some industrial supercomputer. a gibson, no less (*all gasp in fear and respect* ). turns out that this file is very important to the eeeeevil fisher stevens who will stop at nothing to get it back. for those of you keeping score at home, that’s academy award winning documentarian fisher stevens. oh no, his skills aren’t limited to affecting an offensive indian accent and chasing johnny5 around, he can also direct him some documentaries about dolphin abuse. and that’s important. fisher steven’s partner in crime is dr. melfi for some reason. she’s completely useless in this film and is there primarily to not understand technical jargon and to shriek about things that don’t go her way.

before we go any further on the plot, let’s talk for a moment about wardrobe. now, i was a teenager in the 90’s and i remember some pretty lame fashions. what i don’t remember however, is people dressing like a scuba diving expedition could break out at any minute. was i asleep during the aqua action gear fashion movement? kate sports a few lycra skindiving shits, and at one point, dade wears a life vest to a party. an actual life vest. with buckles and straps and everything. remember in back to the future when the soda jerk asks marty if he just jumped ship because his puffy vest looked like a life preserver? this is just like that except that dade’s vest would actually keep him afloat if his boat ever capsized.

also, everyone in this movie carries a pager. bright yellow and orange motorolla skypagers abound. I know that cell phones still weighed 8 lbs back then and weren’t nearly as ubiquitous as they are now but i always thought that beepers were just for drug dealers. guess i was wrong.

dade's other cyberpossee members are pretty fashion forward as well. the interminable matthew lillard portrays cereal (you know, like cereal killa) and he spends the movie sporting some pippy longstockings french-braided pigtails in various locations around his head. his clothing choices tend to involve sleeveless tees and utility belts. and a pager. another character wears a leopard print top with mismatching leopard print zuba pants. tres chic! at one point, kate is shown at home, by herself, on a computer, rocking a sheer top with no bra. this was at best a puzzling choice. it was like, ‘hey nobody, look at my boobs!’

hackers also features a fair amount of hollywood enhanced and overly glamorized depictions of technology use. it would be cruel to the viewer to actually show the mind-numbing banality of realistically fat, zitty hackers sitting in front of computer screens for 90 minutes. hackers forgoes gritty realism for slick, bright and shiny techno action! first and formost, is my most favorite of cinematic contrivances, the computer monitor face projection! i don't know about you, but when i'm watching videos of frolicking kittens on my computer screen, people who are looking at me do not see the reverse image of that video projected onto my face. maybe they just made monitors that much more powerful back in the mid 90s, but i doubt it.

computer interfaces in the world of hackers look a lot more like screensavers than they probably should. instead of a recognizable set of icons and lists and windows, many of the screen shots we're treated to feature swirling technicolor math equations, explosions of color, disjointed text and nonsensical shapes. the computer world of the gibson (*hushed awe*) is a cityscape of digital towers lined with file names, a circuitboard of streets pulsates below. the virtual camera glides in through a grid of towers, driven by the eeeeeevil fisher stevens and his techno goon, penn gillette who together co-operate a gigantic bright orange keyboard with round buttons. practical? intuitive? probably not. that's why it's up to the misunderstood genius of the hackers to operate these technologically advanced wonders. or something.

in any case, characters periodically drop technobabble references to remind us how tech savvy they are throught the entire movie. a pci bus? no way! at one point, dade stands in front of a mirror doing his best travis bickle using 3 ¼” disks instead of a gun. you talkin' to me? no sir. no i wasn't.

and you better believe this flick has a montage. they had to show lots of stuff, happening at once, giving the impression of the passage of time. set to music. techno music. i'm guessing this soundtrack features more than one paul oakenfold track.

the climax of this film is really a wonder to behold. the heroes have eluded the authorities throught the story with varying degrees of success and are now on the lamb. they have no choice but to hook up their laptops to payphones and do something with the garbage file. i forget exactly what that is. it really doesn’t matter. in any case, they are intercepted online by the eeeeeevil fisher stevens and penn gillette and a furious technocyber cage match ensues. there is much pointing and clicking and loading and deleting. the participants get worked up into a frothy boil and in the end, our heroes are the last men and woman standing. The eeeeeevil fisher stevens and dr. melfi are carted off to jail and everyone lives hackerly ever after. the end.

Comics: Nemesis #1 Review by Optimus Douche

Check out the original and Optimus Douche's other reviews over at AintitCool.com!

NEMESIS finally helped me crack the Millar Conundrum; that puzzling ability he has to polarize the comic book community into almost equal sized camps of blind-rage and gushing-adoration for his work. Millar is essentially the Michael Bay of comic writers. And I don’t mean that as an insult. He appeals to the 15 year old in all of us, tickling the same part of our brains with comic panels that Mr. Bay tickles with robots blowing shit up and Megan Fox bending over. Seriously, every panel of NEMESIS made the 15 year old in me that still “rages against the machine” go “Fuck…Yes!!” Now what did the 35 year old Optimous think? Well, he was a little pissed that he just paid $2.99 for a book that is basically a lot of carnage, a whole lot of swearing, and so shallow that I almost snapped my neck diving into it.

Comics: Olympus Vol. 1, Reviewed by Tim Hershey

Olympus vol. 1, by Nathan Edmondson & Christian Ward, Image Comics

I chose Olympus because of my interest in Mythology. I heard good things about it, and knew the story was based around Castor and Pollux, and their “bounty-hunter” careers. I had no idea how Edmondson wrote or how Ward drew, so it was completely brand new to me when I read it.

Weekly Web-Up: Amazing Spider-Man # 626

Greetings to all our fellow Tards out there!  It’s time for the latest installment of the “Weekly Web-Up” with JD and Master Filmmaker Mark Mackner!  Read on, True Believers!

Mark:
The Gauntlet continues!  Last week saw the release of that instant-classic Rhino vs. Rhino story, and now we have this standalone story.  Well, I mean, it ties into the Gauntlet and all, but there isn’t an official Gauntlet villain.  A classic villain, THE SCORPION, is mentioned.  And the 2^nd Scorpion, the female one who was a supporting player in HULK a few years back, makes an appearance.  Remember her, JD?

The Blind Side of the Oscars

Well, in my quest to see all of the top 10 nominations for best picture I watched "The Blind Side". This was a fun feel good movie, but apparently the Oscars felt bad because Sandra Bullock has never won for Best Actress. She wasn't horrible, but she wasn't outstanding.

The Blind Side was a 7.5 out of 10. This movie was based on a true story about an underprivileged kid, Quinton Aaron, that was taken in by a wealthy family to become a great football player. Throughout the whole story you see the typical feel good story elements, but nothing special from the actors or actresses. In fact I enjoyed the little son, Jae Head, the most. He seemed to be the comedic relief to wake me up from watching this film.

So to sum up this short review. It's not a must see, but you wouldn't regret watching it on TNT or some other television release.

Comic Review: The Anchor

Reviewed by Tim Hershey:

The Anchor vol. 1, by Phil Hester & Brian Churilla, BOOM Studios

OK, I was really excited about this book. The marketing made it sound cool: “God’s Own Leg-Breaker!” I’m ready for pseudo-religious ass-kicking, mixed with some mythology. The promotional images were reminiscent of Mignola’s Hellboy! This was going to be a great read, with great visuals!
 

Wow. I have been hosed by marketing (yeah, that never happens…). This book was boring. Maybe my expectations were too high. Maybe I assumed that every idea that Hester has, because of his generally being accepted as a good storyteller by people in the industry, would be well-executed. Maybe my mental images of the art were too Mignola-esque, that no one (except Mignola) could meet my expectations. Well, no matter why, I was bored. From the first chapter to the last, I kept wondering when it would get more interesting. I turned the last page and decided I won’t need to pick up the next volume.

The nicest thing about this book was the $9.99 price tag. All trades should be this price. Yay! Way to go! With the price point. Whooo!

Up in the Air Review

So I have been on a mission to watch all of the movies that were on the Oscar's Best Movies of 2009 Nominees list. So far I have seen 6 out of the 10. In this case I enjoyed the interesting movie that is "Up in the Air."

Weekly Web-up: Amazing Spider-Man 625

Amazing Spider-Man 625
Writer: Joe Kelly
Artists: Max Fiumara
Colors: Fabio D'Auria


JD
Hey there Spider-philes, JD and MasterFilmMakerMarkMackner back again for this weeks Web-Up. More Gauntlet going on, this time returning to the Rhino Vs Rhino storyline from a couple issues back. As you'll recall, unless you're really bad at recalling things, the Old Rhino (Aleksei Sytsevich) has fallen in love and given up wearing the inpenetrable hide to be with his beloved Oksana. However, a douche has gotten himself a more techsavvy version of the Rhino suit and wields a scythe (cause Rhinos...do that?) and has it in his lil brain that he needs to defeat the Aleksei in order to "ascend" into being the new Rhino.

NEW DRUNKTARDS UP NOW!!!

Join JD, Slai, NightPete, Uncle Dunklenutz, Lawgrl, The Hoss, and MasterFilmMakerMarkMackner for this edition of DrunkTards, pronounced JRUNKtards: a pop culture quiz show drinking game! Listen and play along at home!!!!

Comic Review: X-Men Hope #1

Reviewed by Optimus Douche
Check out the original and all his others over at Aintitcoolnews!

X-MEN: HOPE #1
Writer: Duane Swierczynski
Artist: Steve Dillon
Publisher: Marvel Comics

Remember the great training montages from 80s movies like “Karate Kid” (“You’re the Best”) or any of the “Rocky” movies, those brief moments where our protagonist goes from zero to hero all in the course of two minutes and thirty-five seconds? If you went to the movies for those moments alone then you’ll love X-MEN HOPE, because it is basically the price we used to pay for the movies with training montages, minus the movie.

Weekly Web-up: Amazing Spider-Man 624

By MasterFilmMakerMarkMackner and JD!

JD:

Holy Crap! What a revoltin' development for Peter Parker! This issue drops a BOMB!

 

Welcome to our new weekly look at the Amazing Spider-Man, cause MasterFilmMakerMarkMackner and I are such huge Spidey fans. These articles will definitely be SPOILER editions! So beware that we will be revealing anything we want about the issues!

 

Listen to Episode 14! We do a Double-Take on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!

So, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the live-action movie, was the isht when it first came out, provided you were the right age for such things. Which, we happened to be.
Does it keep it's charm? Listen to JD, Slai and Kevin's opinions or else!
:)

A Capricious Pilgrimage: A Review of Scott Pilgrim Vol. 1 Precious Little Life by Bryan Lee O’Malley

by Slai Washko

I was skeptical. I immediately delighted in the unconstrained and fun illustration style, but I feared relating in all the wrong ways having been a Chinese Catholic-schoolgirl who dated older men, like Scott’s ingenue-interest Knives Chau. (Though, “Hooray!” for Asian representation in a comic.)

However, being a songstress instead of a groupie freed me to appreciate this whimsical adventure of improvident youth. My adult veneer and my precocious inner child are having serious debates over this tale. The grown-up version wants Scott to get a real job and an apartment with at least his own room and to stop stringing along a puppy-loving idolizing high-schooler while pursuing a fishnet wearing rollerblade messenger with “evil” ex-boyfriends, but then there wouldn’t be much of story. The non-conformist, uniqueness-celebrating, do-what-you-have-to-do-to-be-happy-and-get-by part of me just enjoys the hell out of Scott and all the characters in his allegory, though I wonder less what life would have been like if I hadn’t decided to work full-time since I was 17 and have markedly achievable goals.

My favorite part of Scott’s world is his scaling system, the introduction of which is: “SCOTT PILGRIM; 23 YEARS OLD; RATING: AWESOME.” It is a simple and to-the- point critique of himself and his surroundings that delineates a nature that is bound to get him into trouble. I look forward to reading the other volumes, but am tentative about how much I want to read before the movie comes out. So whether you’re 20-something and want to dive into some entertaining 20-something angst and rock or you’re if feeling nostalgic, you’ll likely find inked doppelgangers of yourself or people you know. It’s worth a read.

Cheers! Yay!

Slai

P.S. This is the most hyphens I’ve ever used in one article.

Star Trek Online Review - by Optimus Douche

by Optimus Douche

I figured PopTards needed an infusion of some gaming geeky goodness, so I’m taking a break from my comic book reporting duties on Ain’t It Cool News to describe my first month on the amazingly fantastic MMO Star Trek Online.

Episode 13 is up! KICK-ASS MOVIE REVIEW!

Slai and JD were fortunate enuff to attend a special advance screening of new comicbook movie KICK-ASS! Hear us ramble about it before the movie even comes out! Up on the fence about whether or not you wanna see it? Steal our opinions as your own! Leave comments below!

Lost Discussion with Jess "The Hoss" Tutton

Lost "The Lighthouse"

This was a pretty cool episode, leading to hopefully a super cool showdown episode next week. This episode was mostly about Jack being groomed by Jacob (via Hugo) to do whatever it is he needs him to do. Become Jacob? Do whatever Locke was supposed to do? Be the candidate to defend the island? Meanwhile, in never never land, or the alternative reality Jack has a kid. Huh- what? A teenage kid at that. When did that happen? And how did the plane not crashing cause him to have a son? That whole thing is still so unclear. Also unclear why blowing up the hatch caused the island to never exist. I guess we'll get more on that plotline later.

Creative Cattle Prods

 So Ladies and Gents, this week I have a two-for. I’m feeling perhaps a little creatively stale in the cold of this winter of which I had grown unaccustomed, in the midst of corporate drudgery and am turning back to those guides that have previously paved my way to productivity.

Movie Review by Pete Tutton: Street Fighter

Let’s be honest. Street Fighter II could never have been made into a good movie. I don’t care if Martin Scorsese and Steven Speilberg had a three way with Peter Jackson while James Cameron gently touched himself in the corner, the resulting love child could not make compelling cinema out of this video game title.

Episode 11 is up! Movie Review: The Wolfman

Spoiler Alert!!! So go see it and then come back and torture your ear drums.

Weekly LOST Discussion! by Jess "The Hoss" Tutton

Episode 4: The Substitute

Things are becoming clearer, aren't they? As we thought previously, Jacob has been selecting people to bring to the island. This is why he touched them. And why the Man in Black knew how people keep ending up on the island. The Man in Black states that Jacob wants them there as replacements. However, it is unknown if everything he states is true. It was cool to see the last names of our castaways behind the famous "numbers." It is also interesting to see how early on Jacob chose some of our castaways.

Which brings me to my new theory. Perhaps the parallel universe we are seeing, sans plane crash is the world that would exist if Jacob had not chosen to bring certain people to the island. This may explain how Ben is a school teacher. However, fate is fate, and without Jacob's intervention, it seems that certain paths were meant to cross. Maybe this would help to explain why certain things are different. Like why Hurley is happy or something, and not afraid of the numbers anymore. It does not explain why Locke lived unless it was not Jacob who prevented him from dying. Who knows.

Also of interest this episode- the boy? Was it a young Jacob? Was it someone else? Is he a ghost? Is he a ghost of a formerly dead Jacob? As we know, the Man In Black, has inhabited other bodies once he died as a human. Perhaps this is the age that Jacob first died at, and Jacob later went into another body. Who knows? All we know is that kids can't be born though, and he had on some old ratty looking clothes. My guess is that he is from a former time- but when? His warning to man in black was "You can't kill him." Did he mean, you can't kill Sawyer? As Richard hinted he might? Or did he mean you can't kill Jacob? As in those are the rules? Or as in Jacob can't really die? Many possibilities.

Well Man in Black did not kill Sawyer, but did recruit him. As Richard said he would. Richard also warned that he wanted Sawyer and everyone else dead. He is seemingly playing to Sawyer's desire to get off the  island. But as true to his dark nature, it does not seem possible that he is all the way telling the truth. Richard seems very very afraid. Yes Man in Black wants to get off the island, but what does he want to do when he leaves? Does he want to kill many people- is this what Richard is referring to? I do think there is some sort of balance between the Man in Black and Jacob, that has been offset and the Man in Black may be dangerous not only to the island- but to the world at large. He may want the world dead, in some kind of satany apocaylpse kind of way, and hence his need to "recruit."

I do not think it is an accident that Jacob is the name of a ruler. Jacob is a name with significance in the bible, and Jacob was often at odds with others. I was re-reading some Biblical information today and there were some similar themes. Not to say that this about God or anything or the bible, but it may be that there are some recurring historical themes between good and evil.

I really enjoy the alternative reality Hurley and how he is so happy and granting wishes left and right. He seems like an angel. Interesting that Locke was with his girlfriend as they had been broken up before the crash of the light. So some past realities have been resolved. However, Rose still has cancer. Things are messed up, past and present, it's not like everything was fixed from the time of the bomb on...

The more I've given thought to this episode, the cooler it seems.

Anyways, please do discuss amongst yourselves, lots of good food for thought this week....

Weekly LOST Discussion! Part 2 - by Jess "The Hoss" Tutton

LOST review, Season 6, Episode 2 "What Kate Does"

Sorry this is a little delayed folks, by internet was misbehaving in the Blizzard (the second one) of 2010. Also sorry for all the questions and stream of consciousness. But, this is LOST. It's hard to peg down.

This episode was okay. I wasn't on the edge of my seat or anything. It seems to be one of those episodes that seemingly continues to string us along, leading us into begging for more information. What did we learn? Not too much this time around. Well, we saw that Clare is still alive though the "new Others" say she is "infected." Her new style and ways seem to imply she is Rousseau-ing it up. Also, all this talk of "infection" is very season 1-3. Rousseau said this is what happened to her team. And we do know they died somewhere around the temple as we saw Jin help them last season, in a time travel twist. What is this infection? We don't know. Rousseau didn't die but her crew did, will Sayid die... again? Is this a physical disease or a spiritual disease? When they brought Sayid back to life, they noticed that the water wasn't clear, was that part of the problem? These are the same people who revived Ben. Was something different about Ben's revival? Just some interesting things to think about.... Kate is also very interested in meeting up with Claire. Is Clare dead? Was Rousseau already dead when we saw her? And why do you need to poke someone with hot sticks to figure out if they are infected?

It doesn't appear that Sayid is being inhabited by Jacob. Who knows. When the Man in Black inhabited Locke, he had two bodies, so I guess that kind of makes sense. But, I don't think we've seen the last of Jacob.

In the other plotline, after they get off at LAX, it seems Kate still plays a role in Claire's birthing of Aaron. The adoptive family can not adopt Claire's baby. It seems that even on the other plane of existence, in one way or another, things happened as they did on the island. It does seem that a common theme seems to be that as Daniel had said, things are meant to happen and will happen no matter what. Interesting to see Ethan reemerge in the hospital. Why is he not on the island? It also appears that some of them recognize each other in some way, so it will be interesting to see how that angle plays out. Will the end be the same in both places, stay tuned.

I think a theme of this whole season , and really the whole series- is two different teams. Dark versus light. Good versus bad. Team man in black versus Jacob team. It's confusing to think how Clare and Rousseau fit in, along with our LOST castaways. Who is good and who is bad? Is there a good or a bad, or just a "dilemma"?

We saw Rob McElhenney of "It's Always Sunny" fame reprise his role - briefly- as Aldo. This gave us a general tee hee in our household.

Feel free to post away about things you noticed, or any clever ideas you might have, or any questions. Goodness knows you could write a dissertation on such things. So keep the discussion going!

Episode 10 is up! JRUNKtards

Enjoy our crappy drinking game quiz show!!


...I said ENJOY IT!

Comics: Demo #1

Demo Vol 2, #1
The first maxi-series titled Demo, brainchild of indy superstars Brian Wood and Becky Cloonan, was a fantastic collection of one shots, detailing the trials of "real life" characters having some sort of paranormal power. Basically, an indy take on mutants. And, for the most part, it was great. There were perhaps one or two issues that didn't really capture me the way the rest of the series did. Sadly, with the inaugural story of this second volume, this issue is one of those. Becky Cloonan's artwork is, as always, engaging and dynamic..but Wood's story hinges on the ending; the answer that the main character is seeking. Which, from the beginning, seemed obvious and, if I may, a bit "been there, done that".

And an argument might be made that it's not the destination, it's the journey. Not in this case, I'm afraid. It's a one-shot and therefore the story isn't really given any room to breathe. Joan's recurring nightmare, her increasing obsession over that nightmare, the fact that she's been up for 9 days straight. None of that is really FELT, it's just SAID. So, while this story is too quick to really get involved, it also would have been a shame to give it any more definition since the ending was obvious from the beginning.

However, I'm still very optimistic about the rest of the series, I just wish this issue had been placed somewhere in the middle of the series, as it wasn't the best one to start off with.

Comic Review: The Bomb

The  Bomb – Steve Mannion

 

 The term ‘guilty pleasure’ has become both overused and a defensive shield for enjoying music, games, tv, etc, that others might possibly snub their noses at:

 

Sublime tribute band? Guilty pleasure.

Straight to DVD movies with poor CGI monsters? Guilty Pleasure.

Any Stephen King book in the last 20 years? Guilty Pleasure.

 

The time has arrived ladies and gentlemen to cast aside the moniker of Guilty Pleasure, grab your privates, raise your middle finger, and scream in a faux British accent, “Sod off! I fekkin’ love this!” Have pride in your opinions and trust in your taste.

 

The Bomb is just such a beast. Essentially, the book is about a vamped -up pugilistic roller skating Bettie and Veronica imagined by Big Daddy Ed Roth, Mad Peck, Sam Keith, or  John Kricfalus running around fighting zombies, Nazi-doctors, and mindless mutant thugs who are, as per usual attempting to ruin the collective lives of the Cleavers.  

 

Mannion’s world is brimming with page girl vixens and ham-fisted violence. He makes dutch-oven jokes and moose antlers seem sexy and fun. Mannion’s dialogue is reminiscent of Bazooka Joe comics with the same rim-shot punchlines. What this collection lacks in cohesion and plot (it reads like years of restarted mini-comics pasted together) it makes up for in the beauty and whimsical nature of the art. Each panel is a toss back to pre-comic code excellence without feeling cliché or forced. It is clear Mannion loves his work.

 

The book has, for me, destroyed the concept of Guilty Pleasure. I feel no guilt what-so-ever in stating that despite the lack of significant cohesion of the book, I am ready to shell out more money for Mannion’s current book Fearless Dawn.

Comics: The Unwritten, Vol.1

The Unwritten: Vol 1. Tommy Taylor and the Bogus Identity

Mike Carey and Peter Gross

Reviewed by Kire Carlson

 

Harry Potter is a chump. J.K. Rowling, despite her fame and billions, managed to patchworks bits of Tolkien and Vertigo's Books of Magic into a commercial tapestry which covered the world in milquetoast colors of feigned originality. Lost in the stitches of Rolwing's tale was that of Timothy Hunter; Vertigo's be-speckled and orphaned world mage. But really, where is the harm in that? 

 

Carey and Gross, both of whom muddled about in Hunter's universe  either directly or indirectly, have sought to claim what Rowling had stolen from society. Stories with punch. The tale of Unwritten begins as simple satire: Young Tommy Taylor, or Tom as he begs to be called, is the living blueprint of his father's bestselling fictional character: An aged Christopher Robin or a twenty-sometihng Alice Liddell. The disappearance of the real Tom's father has the world salivating with questions and accusations. A sudden scandal following TommyCon, divides the legion of fans into those who believe he is a fraud and those who are convinced he is the second coming. What follows is a traversing of the literary world and enough allusions to satisfy any bibliophile. 

 

Carey does what Carey does best. He leaves enough plot holes exposed to keep astute readers curious and willing to sit through anything. Those who followed his Hellblazer run will remember that it took him over a year to resolve many of the extensive an plot issues. Cary is a master storyteller and for those patient enough to follow him, the payoff rarely fails. Gross' work, although typically inconsistent and seemingly stuck in the 80's, is still stronger than most Vertigo books and in no way detracts from the overall story. In fact, it dose what the best Vertigo books do, it causes a healthy confusion in the reader as one tries to discern why TommyCon would have other authors featured or a family event would allow slash fiction depicting Tommy tooting his Magic Horn to be prominently displayed. 

 

Ironically, the strongest tale in this TPB is not the Tommy stories but a tale of Rudyard Kipling, Oscar Wilde, and MArk Twain. Carey so convincingly appropriates these authors into his world, that one immediately empathizes with them and, because of this, Carey manages to turn Disney's vision from a kid friendly sing-a-long-for-profit into an allegorical attack on the powers that be. 

 

Essentially, Unwritten is about possession. It is about who owns the stories we love. It is about the freedom of expressing ideas. It is about owning an identity and the repercussions of such a task. It is the invisible thread which holds together stories and connects the real world's greatest escape: Stories. 

If you are not already, it is about time you open your mind to the world of literature and read the Unwritten.

Weekly LOST Discussion!

Season 6, Episode 1 & 2 (LAX Parts 1 and 2)
by Jessica "The Hoss" Tutton

I don't think there is any real way to "review" LOST, so I think the best forum for a weekly discussion of LOST would be a discussion format. I will post some of my thoughts and questions after an episode, and feel free to share your thoughts and feelings as well in the comment section below.

Let me to start by saying how bittersweet Season 6 of LOST is. It's great to finally see the show getting some answers, but sad to know all good things come to an end. However, I think a forced ending will enable the show to go out strong, and prevent any more "Nicky and Paolo" incidents (which the writers have apologized for since!) I am not at all confused by the show, I like the questions it poses. I love shows and movies were I am not handled all the details at once. I like trying to figure things out, and being left with some open doors. Thankfully, the writers of the show want to continue on in this fashion, answering many questions but leaving some hanging out there. In a recent Entertainment Weekly article, they say, "We don't want to explain everything the way midicholorions did for Star Wars." And thank goodness for small favors.

That being said, we did learn some interesting things last night. We learned the man in black is actually also the Smoke Monster. Which brings in the option of the Man in Black and Jacob being able to take on various forms. We also revisited the theme of the "universe has a way of course correcting"- Charlie told Jack "I was supposed to die." Someone on a forum I read pointed out that Kate and Clare were together, so maybe Kate will help Clare deliver Aaron after all. And of course, Christian Shepherd's body is "lost." Jack and Locke had a discussion about faith at the airport.

We also had some more questions raised. Here are some of mine:
- Are we dealing with parallel universes here? How did the past get changed as well? For example, Locke maybe went on a walkabout and Hurley feels lucky as they pull into LAX.
- Did Jacob jump into Sayid's body? Pete guessed this last night and I like the idea. Jacob did go and ask Hurley for help, not to save Sayid's life.
- Why was Desmond on the plane?
- Why wasn't Shannon on the plane? (Not that I miss her mind you, Boone said she decided to stay in her relationship.)
- Why couldn't the Man in Black leave the island, but Jacob can? And wouldn't it be dangerous for him to leave the island with his smokiness? I keep thinking the battle between Jacob and Man in Black is good versus evil and really what this is all about? Or is Man in Black's "home" not off the island?
- How is the Widmore vs. Ben thing going to fit in to everything else? Ben seems clueless. However, there have been indications before that Ben and Widmore could not kill each other.
- Are there multple time dimensions/ parallel universes- for example- we see the island underwater?

Anyways, just some thoughts after watching the first episode(s). LOST always makes you think a whole bunch. I thought it was a really great dive back into the spirit of what makes us love LOST. We have some questions, some answers, and only a few more episodes to discover it all. Stay tuned...

Jrunktards...Coming to an Eardrum near you!

So the time has come to unleash what will be the worst game show (in the audio format, silly I know) ever to hit your ears. We test our wits against each other while tackling questions and drinking. Expect expletives, slurring and dumb comments that have nothing to do with the answer.

So by now you are wondering, "How is the game played?" I'm so glad you asked, the game has 3 Sections: Movies, Comics & More and the Lightning Round. Each round is a little different.

Movies:

Quotes - Name that Movie

Word Association - Name that Movie (3 clues)

Comic Books & More:

Straight questions - Multiple Choice and Trivia Questions

Lightning Round:

Categories Scramble - Start with a Category and a crossfire of things in that category

Now you know how it is played you are definitely asking, "How does one win?" Well you determine that. After listening to the podcast you send us your vote. Either on our facebook page (facebook.com and search "Poptards Podcast!") or email us at info@poptardsgo.com. We will then reveal the winner the next episode.

After reading this, if you are interested in participating there are several ways you can. You can submit questions and categories via facebook or email or you can join us in the shenanigans when we record again. Hope to hear from you guys soon. We are recording this weekend so keep your ears to the ground for some cheekiness.

PopTards & PopCorn: The Room

By: Jess "The Hoss" Tutton

My husband and I spend some time looking at the 'Youtubes' for hilarity. We went on a binge once of internet lists of best of worst movies, and joyfully watched scene after scene. While I don’t think “The Room” is the worst movie ever made, it surely is on someone’s Top 20 list. It’s the kind of movie where you expect people to start shedding clothes as you think to yourself, “Surely the crappy dialogue, and 8^th grade play-style sets must ensure this is pornography.” But, no. This is a seriously crafted movie. That is what makes it worth writing about here. In fact, the advertisements bill it as having the passion of Tennessee Williams, at the same time being a lighthearted comedy. I don’t remember much about my English classes in high school, but I DO remember Tennessee Williams is not a jovial kind of guy. I also really seriously doubt the producer was making a comedy. Maybe he just forgot how to make a pornography and had to cover it up somehow?

            The “star” of this movie is Tommy Wiseau, who is also credited on screen as both the movie's producer and executive producer. As per Wikipedia, “Without any studio support, Wiseau spent over $7 million on production and marketing for the film. Wiseau promotes the film as a black comedy and insists that its humor is actually intentional, although cast members have publicly disputed these claims and many audience members generally view the film as a poorly-made drama.”

 Tommy Wiseau looks like he stepped right out of a Warrant video from the late ‘80s, or worse, the early ‘90s. This film was made in 2003. He wears white baggy pants, a long mop of hair, and he walks like he has two large packages of salami taped to his inner thighs. He looks like some sort of German form of Milli Vanilli.  This man gives acting and directing, and frankly spending $7 million, a bad name.

                Actually, let me just stop this review right here, as I just realized, there is NOTHING to review here. It’s just that bad. It would be just a waste of yours and my time to give it any sort of credence and seriously considering the “plot” or “actors” should be taken seriously. Let’s not fool ourselves here folks. Instead, I will present a list of things that make “The Room” worthy material to consider if you are let’s say bored and needing a laugh, or trying to create some sort of fun new drinking game.

1) Wiseau films everyone’s exit from a scene. Pro-long-ed-ly. Apparently he hasn’t discovered a little tactic those in the biz refer to as “editing.”  There are at least 20 minutes in the film of entry and exit. Without words. So realistic! What is Spielberg thinking?

2) Whenever Wiseau’s character (Johnny)  enters a scene, he addresses someone as “Oh, Hi __________.” As woodenly and lack of affect-ly as possible. Because my friends, that is how good movies are made. And how you address all of your friends

3) Wiseau’s character (Johnny)  has a best friend named Mark. We know that they are best friends because Johnny tells us over and over again that they are best friends. Johnny also repeatedly tells Mark, “I am so glad you are my best friend.”  However, you see these two together, and you can’t possibly imagine on what planet these two could be friends. It’s kind of like a T-Rex and a sweet little kitten hitting it off. Huh? How? Right.

4) Mark is amazing. He looks like he fell off a truck headed to a Baywatch convention.

5) Lisa is the conniving girlfriend of Johnny and centerpiece of the film. Lisa looks like she gets her hair and make-up advice from Teen Magazine circa 1988. I know this because this is when I read Teen magazine. You couldn’t be less interested in Lisa. Yet all of the men in the movie are head over heels for her, and she is able to wrap them around her finger. Even though all she does is bitch at people and lie about being pregnant, which no one challenges her on…  

6) There are enough plotholes in this movie to devour a small town/ Hellmouth style for all the Buffy fans out there. Here is an example. Claudette states in a nonemotional tone, ^“I got the results of the test back. I definitely have breast cancer.” And this is never discussed again at any point in the movie. Of course. And why would it be?

7) The biggest insult in the movie is referring to someone as a “chicken.” Be still my beating heart at such a horrible insult. And guess what? They ACTUALLY act it out. And not well. You think acting like a chicken would be mere childs-play. Wiseau looks something like a man being shot with a semi-automatic 20-30 times in slow motion. Chickens everywhere are deeply offended.

8) The flower shop scene. I can’t even do it justice. It’s like someone wrote words down on a paper, had people recite them, and then played them back in high speed dubbing. With as little emotion as humanly possible. In fact, scratch that. This scene had to be done by cyborgs. There is no other way. Here it is, in all of its glory:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7S9Ew3TIeVQ

            Well, considering I never actually WATCHED this film, just watched about 30 minutes of it on Youtube, and thereafteredly wrote this review in 20 minutes, I think my work is pretty slamming.  Really, you don’t need to see the film. I would strongly suggest watching some of the clips on Youtube. This is a pop culture site, so I figured it was okay, and I wanted to kick something in as a Poptards submission. Sadly, this has been bouncing around in my head since I watched it last night and I really needed someone else to enjoy it. Besides, I have to get back to work people.

PopTards Episode 9 is UP!

Uncle Dunklenutz, Slai and JD start a new segment called DoubleTake wherein we watch and discuss a classic from our childhoods..this episode, we're talking Teen Witch (1989) and then come back to the present to talk about Legion and Youth in Revolt!

PopTards and Comic Panels: Joe The Barbarian Review

KEN-u-DIG-it Reviews:

Joe the Barbarian

Writer: Grant Morrison

Artist: Sean Murphy

Colorist: Dave Stewart

Publisher: Vertigo (DC)

***Spoilers!!! Spoilers!!! Spoilers!!!*** Though, in my opinion, I’m not sure if anything is really a big reveal, but better to be safe!

Finally! Grant Morrison doing a Grant Morrison type story in a Grant Morrison type comic. “Joe the Barbarian” gets Morrison back doing what I like best about him. Taking characters that I don’t really know, and just messing shit up. So far it’s just the one issue, but already Joe (and the reader) is thrown into a new and confusing world. That means I’m on board.

The story starts off with a rather overused character; the outcast teen. But hey, it’s probably one of my favorites, so bonus points right off the bat. It’s your basic set-up issue. We learn a little bit about Joe’s life. Meet a possible supporting cast. Find out he can teleport himself into a fictional world made up of his toys. Wait… what?!?! This is where I know I’m reading Morrison. I’m confused already. In a good way, of course. Joe doesn’t seem to be too shocked that he’s magically whisked to another world, as if this isn’t quite new to him. Whether this is all real, or some sort of side effect, I’m not quite sure.

Joe could be passing out from what I’m guessing is diabetes, as his mom, earlier in the issue, reminds him to eat his candy, and at one point, Joe seems to be fumbling for an insulin pen. Or he could be a bit not all there in the head as we see him holding down a one sided conversation with his pet rat (mouse?). My initial thought was that of the movie, “The Butterfly Effect,” when the main character was able to time travel to certain parts in his life by reading his old journal entries. Joe had been in the middle of sketching, and after an initial jolt of teleportation, he tried to calm himself by writing a few words on a piece of paper to read. 

Either way, I’m very intrigued to see what the explanation is, and where it all leads. Especially with the 2-page spread near the end involving Joe’s come-to-life toys surrounding him. I geek-gasmed in my pants a little seeing favorites like Batman and Robin, Transformers, G.I.Joe, He-Man, Santa, and so many more. If only there was a lightsaber thrown in too, this would’ve been my childhood dream.

And of course, this spread couldn’t have been more perfectly done. That’s all thanks to artist, Sean Murphy. I remembered seeing his name on books before, but I know now, I’ll never forget his art again. I love your more “realistic” looking art of say, Jim Lee, David Finch, Ethan Van Sciver, but my heart belongs to the more stylistic of say, Gabriel Ba, Rob Guillory, Paul Duffield. Sean Murphy is now high on this list. And it works so well in this book. His depiction of Joe’s attic room alone deserves some kind of award. It’s a child’s dream! Rope ladder, bunk bed, hanging electric train set, and toys, toys, toys!

Also, I have to give colorist Dave Stewart much love on his drab, 70’s looking color spread. No matter what, when I see his name attached to a comic, I know I’m at least getting something good to look at.

Overall, I highly recommend this book for diehard Morrison fans, or just indie lovers in general. A good solid start off, with plenty of mysteries and questions.

PopTards & PopCorn: Zombieland by Kire Carlson

(Kire thought he'd be a smartass and submit this as his review...so I thought I'd be a smartass and post it anyway - Jd):

Halfway through the film the cast stops to watch Ghostbusters.
It occurred to me that I suddenly wished I was at home also watching Ghostbusters.

The End.

Time Keeps on Ticking by Slai Washko

This week I find myself without a specific media of which I’d like to speak, though I am actively reading, listening, and watching. Three weeks into a new year has me pondering and planning, analyzing and architecting.

Time, that commodity and ever-waning measurement of our lives, is on my mind as of late. I am making it a point to enjoy mine as I hope you are as well.

Before moving back to Pennsylvania in July from L.A. I worked a minimal of 60 hours a week, my record being 93 hours in one week amongst four jobs. I was quite proud at the time. Proud that I was so wanted for my skills and proud that I was physically capable, for reasons I may or may not reveal if you follow my writing. However, there is a price for this pride. I connected with friends and fans of mutual interests through social networking sites more than in person for lack of time and was simultaneously less connected.

Now, 6 months into a lifestyle where I actually have time to spend with friends new and nostalgic, time to further reconnoitre all the arts that revive for me why it’s so miraculous to be human, and time to be well-rested enough to not question my acumen as much, I am valuing all those who purposefully produce that which provides education, entertainment, and salubrious escapism.

In this time of economic instability and insecurity when we can be made to feel like peons despite all we may have to contribute, when we are easily reminded of reprobate representatives of the lesser aspects of “civilization” in the daily news, and when destruction can temporarily overshadow restoration, this is the time we need to acknowledge those that progress our culture forward: artists, heroes, and healers.

Often these archetypes are hidden in the monotony of our quotidian routines, but really, they are wherever you find them. They are waiting to be discovered and inspire you. It may be within a siren’s voice through which heartache is relatable and helps you feel less alone. It may be in a book that makes you laugh in what would have been your darkest moment. It may be in a film that pulls you into a story when your own is less than inviting, but advances you to make a positive change. It may be that video game that lets you be the hero and save the day or safely be the villain when you just want to blow something up. It may be in a picture just meant to move you. And yes, Loves, graphic novels encompass it all. These are never a waste of time and are often better shared.

So here I am aspiring to share, a perspective, some hope. We’re not ‘Tards because we’re lacking. We are making what we want of our time whether or not it suits the speed of society’s standard and we’ll be better people for it.

Well, My Darling Literates, That’s a weight off my brain. As always, thank you for reading and even better would be if you share with me the media that incites you.

Cheers! Yay!

Slai

If a Hulk Falls in the Woods.. and no one gives a crap...?

By JD!
(Mild Spoilers Ahead)

So about 6 issues after Red Hulk appeared, I decided I no longer gave a flimflam who he was.  I know that Bruce can't turn into the Hulk anymore, Leonard Sampson seems to be bad these days, there's a Red She-Hulk running around and General Thunderbolt Ross is dead. Oh and Betty is alive?? This is all I knew before coming in on FALL OF THE HULKS week one. Unsure of which one to start reading first, I took a look at the inside first page and it seemed to indicate with a little arrow that Hulk #19 is the one to begin with. LIES, I tell you! Deceit! Fibberpants!
But anyhoo, this story was pretty basic. Some evil jerkynuts decide to start taking out the 8 smartest people on earth, starting with...you guessed it (or did you? did you even try to guess? I have no way of knowing..cause ..you know..this is a blog.) Reed Richards and his Fantastical Four.  And you know what? I don't care. I have such a hard time caring about the current Hulk sitch in Marvel. And the featured villians in this issue are: Wizard, Klaw, Lyra and Trapster (previously known, amazingly, as Paste Pot Pete)... and so I found little to care about in this issue besides Ed McGuiness' art, which was, as usual, pretty great. Though his Thing looks alot more like an Art Adams Thing then a McGuiness Thing. I hoped that while I didn't care too much of this issue, maybe things would ramp up in the second issue of the week:

Incredible Hulk #606.

My first thought when I finished this issue was "What the Bleep?" and yes, I said "bleep". (That reminds me. If you want something infinitely more entertaining to do right now then read this review, look for a podcast called YODA AND ME. It's awesome.) This issue, first of, all apparently DOESN'T take place after Hulk #19, since Reed an the FF are in a parade, having no mention of...you know..Reed having BEEN KIDNAPPED in the previous issue. So there's that. Annoying. The whole issue just follows Banner as he teleports from place to place, which would be fine, if only it didn't read like someone flipping channels on a Television. Also: who the hell DOESN'T have a friggin' Life Model Decoy of themselves floating around? Jeebus! Seriously. I think there's even one of ME frolicking about out there in the Marvel U, preferably getting some from the newly single Mary Jane Watson.  Again the most positive thing I have to say about this issue is the art by Paul Pelletier who seems to have gotten a lot more gritty since last I've seen him, and the colors ain't too shabby either.

As for the story so far, however, I'm basically just slogging through it in the hopes that something important or interesting might happen.

Muffin-tops and Goths: Wet Moon Book 1

by JayDee!

I am not, despite what my high school bullies may have thought, a 15 year old girl. I am also not goth, though I suppose I may have dabbled a bit while settling myself into the punk subculture. I've always been more about expressing my anger and humor through music then wallowing in sadness and writing in my journal. For these reasons, I'm not totally able to enjoy the characters in this series. There are aspects that I can definitely relate to, like going to art school, hanging out with my reject friends, having fairly mundane conversations about the most trivial of things that seem to mean the world to us. For THESE reasons, I made it through this edition and will be checking out the next one, at least. But whatever pros or cons I may be struggling with in regards to the story, I'm not having any bit of inner turmoil just staring at the art in this book.

The art by Ross Campbell is every beautiful girl that I glance at out of the corner of my eye, but am too chicken-shit to talk to, and so when our eyes meet I quickly look away nervously, not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable. Thankfully this book can't feel uncomfortable, otherwise it would probably issue a restraining order against me just for staring so damn much. And don't get me wrong, it isn't because the characters in the book are drawn as overly sexy. Most of the characters are either lanky and awkward or pudgy and walking around with their muffin-tops hanging over their studded belts.  But everything is so beautifully rendered with such a seductive line that it's just so damn enrapturing.

Book One captures the feeling of being just out of high school and wandering your way into college and all the drama that entails, which is great since that's what the story is about, so far. But it's also part of the problem. So far the story has yet to really capture my attention in any other way but tapping into my nostalgia for entering art school. I'm hoping that volume two really gets into the meat of the story and drags me along for the ride.